PUBCRAWL The Southtowns By Lisa Brown and Ron Ehmke; photos by Don Kreger and Jill Morlock. Tips for groups attempting a self-guided tour of classic Southtowns bars: 1. Ask yourselves, “Where are the Southtowns, anyway?” You may discover that some members of your party believe this legendary snow-socked region ends at the southern tip of Erie County, while others use it for anything from Hamburg to the Pennsylvania border. Still others may define, say, Atlanta as a “southtown.” In any case, have a full tank of gas. Or two. 2. Expect to encounter incredibly friendly bartenders, as well as a staggering amount of wood-grained paneling. Early in the new year, Crawlers Ron, Don, David, and Lisa plus guest experts Jill and Bill Morlock (Buffalonians with Southtowns roots) took to the back roads in search of southern hospitality, WNY-style. (Not covered below is our final fruitless half-hour drive to Eden, where Sunday is not the night to bar-hop.) Marcy and Joe’s Bar-Bill Tavern (185 Main St., East Aurora, 652-7959) ATMOSPHERE: Cozy and inviting. Vintage tin ceiling. BARTENDER HIJINKS: Jill has trouble deciding on a drink order, so bartender Jeff makes a point of staring her down, encouraging everyone else at the table and the bar back to join in until she breaks. THE CROWD: “This was never a kids’ bar,” says Bill. “These are local professionals.” FOOD NOTES: Extensive menu, organized into “Starters,” “Bits and Pieces,” and “Specialties,” including signature beef on weck. David craves a burger—the one thing they don’t offer. BRANDING OPPORTUNITIES: Bar name appears on mugs, multiple neon signs, stained glass window, an illuminated specialty clock, ATM, jukebox, liquid soap in the restroom, and a framed poster of the duck who walks into a bar and orders a drink he can’t afford. WORDS OF WISDOM: Appropriate for a joint so close to the Roycroft campus, an Elbert Hubbard-esque wall sign exhorts patrons to “Laugh, relax, and indulge.” MUG CLUB: Regulars get their own engraved glasses, displayed behind the bar. OUR TAB: 1 Blue, 3 fancy beers, 1 bloody mary, 1 virgin mary, 2 diet Pepsis, chips and fries for $34.50. The Flip Side (formerly Strykersville Lanes) (3803 Main St., Strykersville, 585-457-9991) ATMOSPHERE: Several distinct spaces, including two summer decks, large dining room, smaller bar, and six-lane bowling alley. BARTENDER HIJINKS: Impromptu beer-themed cheer. FOOD NOTES: David finally gets his cheeseburger; gives it two thumbs up. Homemade potato chips inspire raves. WORDS OF WISDOM: Another Hubbard-y “Live, love, laugh” wooden sign. Less Roycroftish sentiments include “Beer: the only reason I get up every afternoon.” BRANDING OPPORTUNITIES: T-shirts, $15. OUR TAB: 3 Blues, 1 fancy beer, 2 diet Pepsis, cheeseburger for $16.63. Village Pub (3974 Main St., Strykersville, 585-457-9545) ATMOSPHERE: Farm-equipment-festooned rear dining room is the kind our moms would call “charming,” so we avoid it in favor of the smaller, funkier bar in front. THE CROWD: Every single customer except for us (all four of them, on this quiet Sunday) is wearing plaid flannel, probably not as a post-ironic retro-grunge fashion statement. WORDS OF WISDOM: Random sample of ceiling-height bumper stickers includes “God, guns, and guts made America / Let’s keep all three,” and “Porn—it’s cheaper than dating.” FOOD TALK: “Sammiches,” “appeteasers,” and “wabbit stuff.” Plenty of unusual dishes, including toasted ravioli with blush sauce. Nightly all-you-can-eat specials. BARTENDER HIJINKS: Hearing Jill say our next stop is “Willow Hollows,” our bartender and aforementioned plaid quartet yell, “It’s HOLLAND WILLOWS,” jokingly warn that the place is infested with giant rats, and swear we’ll be back in an hour. OUR TAB: 3 Blues, 3 fancy beers, 1 diet Coke for $23.50. The Holland Willows (177 Savage Rd., Holland, 537-9070) ATMOSPHERE: 100% giant-rat-free, this is easily the largest establishment of the night, featuring a spacious bar, recently remodeled eight-lane bowling alley, two-level banquet facility (seats 665), and photogenic garden. UNSETTLING REALIZATION: The minute we order a round—after a half-hour ride down long twisting unlit roads—we realize we have left the last bar without paying. Mortified, Lisa calls the Village Pub and gives them her credit card number. FOOD TALK: Traditional appetizers like clams casino and crab cakes; entrees include steak and lobster. MUG CLUB: Mug, t-shirt, and coffee cup, all for $13.50. BARTENDER HIJINKS: No real hijinks from super-friendly chef/bartender Steven St. George, just a generous tour of the grounds, complete with promotional video. A transplant from Long Island, he laments the absence of good—or any—sushi here. THE CROWD: “We get career drinkers; they don’t drink a lot, but they’ll be here six to seven hours,” says St. George. OUR TAB: 3 Blues, 1 Genny draft, 1 margarita, 1 Coke, and a double order of wings for $39.66. Tab may also include Ron’s first “Cincinnati,” half birch beer and half beer-beer, as he prepares for his future as an elderly midwestern matron vacationing at the beach. Lisa Brown and Ron Ehmke have no interest in stoking the fires of the Strykersville/Holland Giant Rat rivalry. To invite yourself along on a future Pubcrawl, email rehmke@buffalospree.com. Back to the Table of Contents Back to Top